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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

My Top 10 Horror Films Of The Decade. It's SMASHTIME!




I have been head aching myself to try and come up with MY top 10 horror films of the last 10 years. I narrowed it down to the final 10 films that impacted me and had me bragging about each film to horror fans from all over. Most of you have seen them, if not, now's your chance to catch up before the clock hit's 12am on December 31st. Make this New Year's filled with horror and carnage. Here's the brothel full of picks to get your jollies off to!







                                 GINGER SNAPS weighs in a #10. 
The best Werewolf film since An American Werewolf In London. A film that cruises along like The Lost Boys and has you hooked from start to finish. Ginger Snaps cover's it all; violence, comedy, suspense and the perfect high school atmosphere. Look no further for a inspirational werewolf film, Ginger Snaps is a perfect cookie of flavor!




                           #9 - THE HILLS HAVE EYES 'Remake'.
Yes, I added a remake!  There are remakes and then there are remakes that slit you across your throat and leave you to spill your own blood. This is one of the most shocking horror films in a long time. Alexandre Aja has strongly stamped his name on the horror genre. Aja's remake of The Hills Have Eyes proved to me that Aja knows what the horror genre is all about.



                                        #8 'TRICK 'R TREAT'  
We've waited for many years to get our needy paws on one of the most talked about horror movies to grace independent events left and right. When I saw the trailer for "Trick 'r Treat", I had a rush of nostalgia, my mind was flickering like a candle in the wind, my mind raced quicker then an ice luge of alcohol flowing to my mouth, I was determined to follow this movie until it finally got released. October 6th, 2009 will go down in history as this cornucopia of a Halloween themed movie plagued store shelves. Trick 'R Treat is real, the carnage is extreme, this is "TRICK R'TREAT."



 #7 'ORPHAN' 
Many of you may be surprised that I ranked Orphan in at number 7, some might not even like that I included it in my top 10 of the decade, I don't care! After all it does say (MY) Top 10 Horror films of the decade. Orphan surprised me with excellent acting from all three of the children, Esther was brutal and unrelenting in her quest to savage an entire family. The snowy, scenic atmosphere gave the film a chilling look and put you right into the frigged action. Orphan surprised me more then one of those stupid jack in the boxes we use to play with as a kid and I truly appreciate having it in my top 10 of the decade. Vera Farmiga is indeed stunning in the kitchen scene, just had to add that!





 #6 'MARTYRS' 
Prepare to be shock and awed by on of the most ferocious horror film ever made, ever! Martyrs is without a shadow of a doubt a horrific nightmare of a movie. The movie Martyrs will make you feel uncomfortable in your chair, it then will take a baseball bat of emotions and swing it across your fu*king skull to have your head fall of your shoulders, then in it's final wake take a chainsaw and cut your fu*cking heart out to make you feel the pain that was induced in this film. Martyrs is the only way you will stay in line, It's the ULTIMATE WEAPON in horror cinema, Nobody is immune! Martyrs will eat up your soul and spit you up like 'up chuck' from the Garbage pail kids, It will twist your body like the Exorcist! It's like nothing you ever witnessed on film before.






                                                 #5 'INSIDE'
Inside is a story very similar to the notebook, OH HELL NO! This is One of the most unrelenting, barbarous, and historically VIOLENT, horror movies ever made. A film by Julien Murry and Alexandre Bustillo. The writers and directors had one goal in mind when they made this film and that was to shock audiences. "INSIDE" features some of the most realistic looking gore and blood splatter ever captured on film, daring the human eye to not look away. I dare someone to tell me this was not violent!


#4 'SHAUN OF THE DEAD'
I picked Shaun Of The Dead for my top 10 of the decade because not only is it a detrimental zombie/horror, it adds spice with very funny dialog. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost shine as a zombie killing duo. Whether it's shotguns or records from a record player, Shaun and Ed take it upon themselves to survive a zombie apocalypse.One of the greatest quotes in the last 10 years has to be "GET FUCKED FOUR EYES!"



                                            
#3 LET THE RIGHT ONE IN
In the wake of Vampire nostalgia along with the ever so popular True Blood , Let The Right One In has left a mark in vampire cinema. 'Let The Right One In',  is the greatest vampire film ever made, a movie that everyone should see, horror fan or not.  Intelligent horror fans are going to be blown away by one of the most imaginative vampire movies to grace the genre, a knock down drag out, one two punch of PERFECTION!  Ryan Daley over at Bloody-Disgusting has said Let The Right One In is a brilliant vampire film. It's exactly the kind of movie that Stephanie Meyers fans would love if Stephanie Meyers fans were ever smart enough to explore intelligent vampire cinema.I don't mind fans of Twilight enjoy those kind of movies but don't go calling it a mythological vampire film.



#2 [REC]
OH MY GOD!!!! Getting down to the nitty gritty, one half of the main event along with my number 1 is [REC] 

As tasty as a water mellon filled with vodka, [REC] is quite possibly one of the most intoxicating horror films to come out in a long time. Directed by Jaume Balaguero, "REC" is a film that looks very similar to the "Blair Witch Project", This film is very reminiscent of a first person video game. Director Jaume Balaguero uses just a hand held video camera to capture the horrific measures of realism. [REC] is overly scary, a movie so driven that it makes washing your hair with battery acid feel more pleasant. Simply it rocks you in the face and stabs your brain with your nose bone. REC is a film that will give you the shivers, same kind of feeling you might get when you think about flossing your teeth with razor wire.

The atmosphere of the film is gritty like a pebble found in your clam chowder, where as The United States version "Quarantine", was polished and made to look like a typical Hollywood film. The scenes of [Rec] are gritty with a dark, claustrophobic settings, which sets the bar for an intense atmosphere. [Rec] is a short, very effective film that will go down in history like a prostitute bobbing on your apples!

 
And Now, The number # 1 horror film of the decade, the grand daddy of them all 'THE DESCENT'


Horror fans, look no further, "The Descent", is your quarter pounder with cheese. One of the best hair-raising horror films ever made. This diamond in the rough has layers and layers of juicy claustrophobia. Never in my time have I seen a movie that covers all areas of horror related elements like The Descent does. Directed by Neil Marshall, this film explores survival and strong empowered woman, who are fighting for their lives in this revolutionary epic tale of persevering through unthinkable odds.


This movie turns from being lost in a cave to a violent fight of survival and I'm squirming like a bunch of sperm going up the birth canal. This might just be the best horror movie I have ever seen! I'm simply speechless. The entire idea of a group of female friends heading into an unexplored cave is pretty realistic, and I recommend anyone that suffers from claustrophobia to see this, Yeah I'm a mean bastard. Its not often that I get scared but during this movie, I was on the edge of my seat. You don't want to miss this one, if you seen it, see it again, and then again. Its like sex, which never gets boring and it always gets the tempo to rise, if you know what I mean. Horror movies do not get much better then "The Descent. A movie that goes beyond our wildest expectations. The Descent is so HARD!









 

2 comments:

Sarah from Scare Sarah said...

Great pics there.

I loved Let The Right One In, it was beautifully shot; blood and snow!

And Shaun of the Dead is a classic - "You've got red on you." is my favourite quote!

"RATED R" [JohnnyHorror] said...

I totally agree with you Sarah. Let The Right One In was done perfectly!

The quotes from Shaun of The Dead will live on forever. I see so many people missing Shaun from their lists, not sure why.